Humble servant of the Nation

Cupboard boy descends to the toilet

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We all do it when we have a spare moment. Bang our names into Google’s search engine and see what comes up.

Julian Assange, who has a bit of time on his hands these days, did this yesterday and is miffed that I referred to him as Wikileaks’ Cupboard Boy in an article I penned last year.

Assange shunned the primary rule of Twitter — never tweet angry — and took to it with fingers twitching maniacally, complaining he was not only not Cupboard Boy but at 188 cm (6’2”), he is a hulking Gargantua.

Why, in another life, he could have got a game for the Washington Generals against their bêtes noires, the Harlem Globetrotters. “Quick, turn around Julian. They’re using a ladder.”

The Cupboard Boy moniker was a joke. In reality Assange lives in a single room; part office, part bathroom which had been used previously by the embassy’s female employees. Neither is he pale to the point of albinism from his years out of the sun as I also suggested. He uses a sun lamp.

Full column here.

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