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Bill Shorten the political contortionist

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Let’s face it, Bill Shorten is the only reason Coalition MPs still get out of bed every morning. Without him, they’d be stuck in the foetal position, rocking gently from side to the side, sucking their thumbs.

If we thought the Turnbull government was a broken husk of a government, we’d be right but in the past six months with the intensity building feverishly over the last fortnight, Bill Shorten has reminded us all that Labor, too, is a shambles, caught in a web of its own making.

A brief history of Shorten’s position on the $16.5 billion Adani mine in North Queensland reveals he’s done more revolutions than Che Guevara. Six months ago Shorten gave the mine the thumbs up. Then he dragged out the party line that he supported the Adani mine provided it “stacked up economically and environmentally.” That was two weeks ago. After a whirlwind trip of the Great Barrier Reef, courtesy of the Australian Conservation Foundation, Shorten had a trademark change of heart, followed by another. Last week he threatened to put the kibosh on the mine entirely. This week he says he no longer supports the mine but will reluctantly let it go ahead.

I’m getting vertigo just thinking about it.

Full column here.

485 Comments

  • wraith says:

    I just realised it was the twelfth, and panicked a bit, then worked out it was only March. Calmed down. Not sure of the mental process of any of that.

  • BASSMAN says:

    Looters take great delight in this…Dutton reaches a new low. No…wait a minute there is one lower. Howard’s Goons raiding a classroom in the middle of the day to deport 2 little kids. Ruddock could not even wait until school finished.

    http://www.abc.net.au/news/2018-03-12/asylum-seeker-family-removed-at-dawn-biloela-central-qld/9538368

  • Henry Blofeld says:

    The downfall of Barnaby Joyce, Mr insider who had many of us fooled, and as it turned out he loved nothing more than to suckle at the teat of the hardworking Aussie Taxpayer, spending willy nilly on making his life better. Be gone with you Joyce, didn’t even have to brains or integrity to make sure he wasnt a dual citizen and when caught out stayed put, addicted to the Taxpayers $$$$$$$$$$’s
    https://tinyurl.com/y9pjcqo4

  • Carl on the Coast says:

    JB, further to your ongoing state of perplexion re “Rites of passage” (Mar 11 @ 9.14pm), I take a more expansive view on what constitutes experiences or events that have lasting impacts as one transitions from adolescence to adulthood.

    Its not just restricted to having one of your front teeth knocked out me old mate.

    Anyway, irrespective of our differing views on the “pre-requisites for manhood”, they are becoming obselete as we now move into the exciting era of gender fluidity, eh.

  • Henry Blofeld says:

    He’s done it Mr Insider, and of course I refer to China’s Xi Jinping where we see China’s Congress voted to abolish presidential term limits, allowing Xi Jinping to rule indefinitely. Not for the wily Xi the pesky mess of Democratic Elections as he sets himself up this morning in his slippers and dressing gown to read the Peking Daily telling readers how wonderful Xi is, pages 1 through 40! I myself like the USA system, 2 terms max. Here in Australia of course as we have seen you are PM at the whim of your Party, just ask Rudd and Abbott.
    https://tinyurl.com/y8u867az

    • Dwight says:

      What could go wrong? Last one who concentrated power to this extent was Mao and the body count is somewhere between 30-50 million.

    • Jean Baptiste says:

      “…….. allowing Xi Jinping to rule indefinitely………. ” Possibly Henry, if he remains popular, otherwise he will be removed.

      • jack says:

        that’s rather the point, in a one party totalitarian dictatorship that is just not possible, and that’s precisely where it goes tits up.

        the leader will and inevitably does use increasingly desperate measures to retain power, as history tells us.

        then we have the spiral to the bottom we have seen witnessing in Venezuela, Zimbabwe, Cuba, etc, etc.

        • Henry Blofeld says:

          jack I have over time encouraged Mr Baptiste to go and live in one of these dreadful totalitarian countries but when push comes to shove the dear man is all p&w just plays lip service to the Dictators who murder their own people as long as he doesn’t live there. Cheers

    • Milton says:

      Or, in Australia, at the whim of the polls. Not sure if they do polls in China to check the general hunky-dory level {and what would be a decent sample?}. Nor do I know the frequency of polling in the USA. Certainly it’s a growth industry here. A lot of people are getting polled fortnightly and I wouldn’t be surprised if they are getting pissed off by it.

  • Jean Baptiste says:

    Looks like The Donald is in for Stormy weather.
    Hey BLOTUS, is it constitutionally possible for the FLOTUS to commence divorce proceedings on the POTUS ?
    If Clinton bombed Serbia every time to distract from Monica, will Trumpie start WW 3 in order to lock himself in the war room to hide from Melania? Melania unhinged would be a handful don’t you reckon?

    ” A Kevlar chastity belt! For you Mr President? Well now that is an unusual request, yes, yes, certainly sir, I’ll see what we can do. “

    • Henry Blofeld says:

      Bless you dear dear Mr Baptiste you are so funny. Goodness thank god none of your so called “predictions” ever come true but keep trying dear fellow keeps us all amused. Cheers

  • Perentie says:

    Usie’s overdue for a big one. Now would be a good time.

  • Dwight says:

    Does being a leftist rob you of a sense of humor? President Trump that Xi Jingping had the laws changed to be President for Life.

    The President said: “He’s now president for life. President for life. No, he’s great. And look, he was able to do that. I think it’s great. Maybe we’ll have to give that a shot some day.”

    CNN, MSNBC and WaPo went nuts. Literally.

    • Trivalve says:

      Just how far left is CNN Dwight? Did having Fox News in the outer limits shift the centre?

      • Dwight says:

        CNN is an interesting case. They became a global force when they were the go to channel for reports on the Gulf War. Real, serious correspondents.
        Now, under Zucker they’re trying to monetize 24/7 anti-Trump hysteria. It’s not a good look. Chris Cuomo is a case in point. Brother of Democrat governor. Son of former Democrat governor. Hmm… Might he have been a big Clinton supporter? And he’s an anchor.

        • Carl on the Coast says:

          Deadweight?

        • jack says:

          Dwight, I watched an hour of CNN news while on the treadmill a little while ago, they got to about 35 minutes before the first non Trump bashing item, and that was a weather story.

          even the coverage of Xi’s lifetime leader prize was seen only through the lens of Trumps comment on same.

          my perception is that all of the US networks are chasing their individual niche markets rather than seeking to appeal to the middle.

    • Jean Baptiste says:

      The bit you are missing Dwight is that Trump does not have a sense of humour.

    • Milton says:

      No need to look too far, Dwight to notice that the garden variety lefty ideologue are very earnest types. Heaven help them if they heard laughter as their self-absorption would lead them to think it was them being laughed at. And that would never do, Dwight.

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