We’ve always known it. We are miles ahead of the New Zealanders.
Last night in tortured reminiscence of our own political events post the 2010 election, NZ king/queen maker, Winston Peters announced he would support Labour and the Greens in loose coalition and allow Labour to form minority government. Thus Jacinda Ardern became NZ’s fourth prime minister in the last 18 years.
We have proven we can manage that feat in the space of about 18 months.
Bill Shorten got so excited he forgot how to spell or at least forgot how to spell the name of the freshly anointed political big wig of New Zealand, omitting the second ‘r’ from Ardern.
A correctly spelled missive was quickly dispatched but it did make me wonder. For the last 50 years the Americans have been having fun with our prime ministers’ names. From the simple misunderstanding over Malcolm Fraser’s preference for using his middle name as the more familiar to his first, all the way to our current PM who is known in Washington DC as Marlon Tumblington at last check.
Full column here.
See Kevin’s out of his box again.
It’s tough being a legend in your own lunchtime, I bet Bill can’t wait until he gets around to him probably when the next election is called.
Heard a rumor that his biography will run to two volumes. Really?
The editors made lots of cuts Dwight.
volume one, i am an arsehole, volume two, always was
HA! Nice!
Joke isn’t it, only Kevin knows how great Kevin is.
What do you expect from a man who will use three hundred words when ten will do?
Big print 🙂
Clive James’ runs to 5 now, but they’re actually worth reading. Doorstops usually come a lot cheaper than buying something that I’m probably likely to place those of Leonid Brezhnev, Todor Zhivkov, or Enver Hoxha in front on my Christmas list.
Are you struggling, Jack, with the vast network of your social media contacts? “Social” being a shroud for all kinds of nefarious ghouls and assorted nitwits.
So, I’ve just cottoned on to a new rule. I accept that most compulsive talkers inject ‘absolutely’ into any and every phrase or utterance, that’s just a reflection of us being, culturally, somewhere south of the arse end. But, when it comes to typing the same useless word into a tweet – that, for ordinary mortals is 140 chars max – that requires a special kind of self-derogation. Therefore, to hasten the process, I will unFollow everyone who commits that offence against nature.
Will forward examples of the kind.
Anyway, the most recent Clarke & Dawe replay, originally from April 2014, is like ancient history.
http://iview.abc.net.au/programs/clarke-and-dawe-from-the-archives/NC1711V033S00#playing
“What would an App do?” “More crayons, Brian?”
I hope Ms Ardern will help to raise the bar, too, but I fear the brand-trashing meme machines in Belarus are going flat out.
BTW, my dental mechanic drives a Porsche. I figure that’s about 50 implants – for suckers whose parents couldn’t be arsed to teach them good dental hygiene.
Absolutely, HU.
Here’s a helpful list of “New Zealand” speak, Mr Insider, that may make a trip across the ditch so much easier. I note Jacinda has a very broad NZ accent.
Milburn – capital of Victoria
Peck – to fill a suitcase
Pissed aside – chemical which kills insects
Pigs – for hanging out washing with
Pump – to act as agent for prostitute
Pug – large animal with a curly tail
Nin tin dough – computer game
Munner stroney – soup
Min – male of the species
Mess Kara – eye makeup
McKennock – person who fixes cars
Mere – Mayor
Leather – foam produced from soap
Lift – departed
Kiri Pecker – famous Australian businessman
Kittle crusps – potato chips
Ken’s – Cairns
Jumbo – pet name for someone called Jim
Jungle Bills – Christmas carol
Inner me – enemy
Guess – vapour
Fush – marine creatures
Fitter cheney – type of pasta
Ever cardeau – avocado
Fear hear – blonde
Ear – mix of nitrogen and oxygen
Ear roebucks – exercise at the gym
Duffy cult – not easy
Amejen – visualise
Day old chuck – very young poultry
Bug hut – popular recording
Bun button – been bitten by insect
Beard – a place to sleep
Sucks Peck – Half a dozen beers
Ear New Zulland – an extinct airline
Beers – large savage animals found in U.S. forests
Veerjun – mythical New Zealand maiden
One Doze – well known computer program
Brudge – structure spanning a stream
Sex – one less than sivven
Tin – one more than nine
Iggs Ecktly – Precisely
Earplane – large flying machine
Beggage Chucken – place to leave your suitcase at the earport
Sivven Sucks Sivven – large Boeing aircraft
Sivven Four Sivven – larger Boeing aircraft
Cuds – children
Pits – domestic animals
Cuttin – baby cat
Munce – usually served on toast
Thet’s hullarius!
Good to see you back TBLS…
Strictly dependent on the manners of one or two other contributors, Penn. I don’t need strangers chucking abuse at me and sooking to the teacher when they cop a bit back.
On a job in UnZud a couple of years back we were discussing pegs, which were being stuck in the ground in large numbers on a daily basis.
Me: You lot call pegs ‘pigs.’
Him: Yip. (They actually write ‘yip’ btw)
Me: What do you call pigs then?
Him: Ha ha. Pugs.
Me: What do you call pugs then?
Him: F*ck off
But this is relevant: https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DMmOYLnU8AESwak.jpg:large
I suppose every group thinks it is the only one to not have an accent. The NZ accent is no stranger than any other group, certainly no odder than Australian rugby players who get interviewed, generally to our national embarrassment.
Berry Beath – Jacinda Ardern
My Kiwi mate in N Zud was not impressed when I sent it to him.
“Former Test captain and Cricket Australia director Mark Taylor believes the video footage allegedly showing Ben Stokes fighting outside a Bristol nightclub last month makes it “very difficult” for the England and Wales Cricket Board to allow the all-rounder to tour here for the Ashes.”
virtual signalling crap….
I feel sorry for Bill English, as I reckon he’s been screwed by that schemer, Winston Peters.
The deal that Jessica Ardern’s dome with Peters sounds fraught with danger. However, I hope that Ardern gets a fair go in NZ and that she does well.
Interesting times ahead if you’re a Kiwi.
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/picture/2015/nov/27/a-day-in-the-life-of-bill-15-shorten
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/cartoon/2014/jun/06/first-dog-fish
etc etc……
Morgan Godfrey Winston Peters, Mr Insider, the Queenmaker, the man with no seat, can expect a handsome reward from Jacinda, possibly the Deputy PMship? He’s been around in everything bar the 5th at Hukawukafuka and is at the “fag end” of his career so may as well go out on a high. If not Deputy PM then perhaps the Foreign Affairs Minister. Nothing like an open ended world travel ticket to end ones labors, ask Julie Bishop.
http://tinyurl.com/y7rk9547
Henry, sometimes you drive me crazy, but there are other times you make me laugh out loud. The comments you have made so far on this topic have done just that. Very clever Henry and very funny
Actually JTI NZ is a decade ahead of us here in Aus. they have had an ETS for nearly that long. On every measure the latest piece of denialist ideologicL rubbish out of the coalition will fail this Nation. No Surprises.
https://theconversation.com/will-the-national-energy-guarantee-hit-pause-on-renewables-85978
and do you think the NZ ETS has been a success?
They have better, faster internet. The NBN will loom large as an election issue here.
not sure i can see how it works as an election issue.
if labor say they would have done fibre to the front door, don’t the coalition say that at the speed you were rolling it out no-one much would have it.
voters think they are both talking BS
Complaints to the Telco ombudsman have doubled in the last 12 months for net, down for mobile connections. A lot of these complaints come from small businesses. Labor could say what they would have done or will do but that doesn’t matter a whole lot. The current state of affairs is all on Malcolm.
Got to disagree with you mate. Once the summer blackouts hit–and they will hit–the only issue will be power.
In that case, I think the punters will be inclined to blame the mob in power – no pun intended.
Jandals you actually get used to if you spend time there.
Easy as Chilly Bin (an esky) & the West Island (Australia). 😊
Good to see Labor & the Greens working together – lucky NZ.
Should ensure economic chaos by the next election Bella
Jack, i am sorry you stuck the wedding photo on the top of that article, i will be grinding my teeth about it all weekend.
if you think giving Prince Phillip a knighthood was a bit of a political own goal, and it was, this was much much worse.
the advisers responsible should have spent the next three years painting the posts on the dog proof fence.