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Cupboard boy descends to the toilet

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We all do it when we have a spare moment. Bang our names into Google’s search engine and see what comes up.

Julian Assange, who has a bit of time on his hands these days, did this yesterday and is miffed that I referred to him as Wikileaks’ Cupboard Boy in an article I penned last year.

Assange shunned the primary rule of Twitter — never tweet angry — and took to it with fingers twitching maniacally, complaining he was not only not Cupboard Boy but at 188 cm (6’2”), he is a hulking Gargantua.

Why, in another life, he could have got a game for the Washington Generals against their bêtes noires, the Harlem Globetrotters. “Quick, turn around Julian. They’re using a ladder.”

The Cupboard Boy moniker was a joke. In reality Assange lives in a single room; part office, part bathroom which had been used previously by the embassy’s female employees. Neither is he pale to the point of albinism from his years out of the sun as I also suggested. He uses a sun lamp.

Full column here.

92 Comments

  • Dismayed says:

    Interesting. Meth use dropping since 2013 as the hysterical claims on use rise. More research today showing Baby boomers are the worst for Drug and alcohol abuse. Why are we not testing for the Pension? Oh and the point of the article. the Government ignoring expert advice. No surprises. Blame and shame the sick blame and shame the poor, mislead the Nation. That is the coalition we have today.
    https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2017/aug/24/coalition-warned-drug-dealing-will-rise-if-testing-of-welfare-recipients-goes-ahead

  • Henry Blofeld says:

    As a Military History buff, Mr Insider, a short clip here of the late great British Fighter Ace, Douglas Badar, on their “This Is Your Life” in 1982. Bader lost both legs in a aeroplane crash in the early 1930’s and then got some “tin” ones. You will also see the German Ace Adolf Galland make an appearance near the end as he and Douglas became friends. Sadly Douglas died the same year of a heart attack aged 72yo. He spent many years after the war working for SHELL in charge of their Aviation Division which gave him a chance to fly all over the World, mainly in single engine aircraft.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XFQ2y5eyvbs

  • Dwight says:

    Grace under pressure:

    http://www.theaustralian.com.au/news/world/toddler-hijacks-british-news-program/news-story/0639c3f148e2ba6f680f14827f48d189

    Once had a toddler attend my class (babysitter issues) who I thanked for asking the best question of the day. An old showman like me is pretty hard to upstage. 😂

  • Milton says:

    Re Brassco – I had to look it up, even though I knew it’s meaning. I’d always thought it was American slang, or NY, Brooklyn type slang but it is actually aussie and spelt brasco. I can’t say I’ve heard it much up here in qld.

    And how does Assange equate what is effectively received cut and paste with ‘journalism’? Theft is correct and plagiarism also works.

  • Dismayed says:

    There are a number of cupboards that need looking into. Yes, yes I know good old Westy is funded at times by Get Up so he must be part of Cormann’s Eastern Bloc conspiracy ( we see the government not satisfied with the asylum seeker Yellow Peril lie is now rolling out the Eastern bloc conspiracy) but this governments spending and subsidising of big business is out of control. thankfully some in the media are prepared to open the cupboard doors.
    https://www.michaelwest.com.au/not-quite-big-four-but-big-law-a-makes-a-good-fist-of-welfare/

    • Razor says:

      There was a man called Westy
      To Dismal he was a besty
      He had the GET UP and go
      To put on a media show
      So Dismal could play with his testes.

  • Milton says:

    Over the wall a comment suggests Assange’s behaviour (via WikiLeaks) as a form of matricide. Fair and plausible enough, but what would a shrink make of his inhabiting a surrogate womb?

    And Jack, seeing as the elevated Julian is taunting you and other ‘journalists’, I reckon you should throw some eggs at his balcony window, get his attention and demand he come down and engage in some fisticuffs.

    Out of curiosity what does he does he do for a tub?

  • Boadicea says:

    Some kid in an exclusive private school in Victoria gets arrested for buying 100 tabs if acid and allegedly distributing them to his friends, one of whom landed up in hospital.
    The mother is outraged that he got expelled from the school and reckons the school is putting it’s reputation ahead of her son’s.
    She seems to be blaming the school for his misadventure. The kid’s upset because he has a criminal record and won’t get into Harvard. Poor child couldn’t get into another private school, and oh, shock horror, has to go to a state school.
    Maybe, just maybe, the parents should take some responsibility for their child’s behaviour?

    • Dismayed says:

      Its a gay left wing, marxist, muslim inner city barista plot. Just ask Cormann.

      • JackSprat says:

        You sure know how to twist words Dismal

        • Boadicea says:

          I thought it was rather idiotic. Typically immature. Not worth bothering with JS.

        • Dismayed says:

          JS You should consider adding more fibre to your diet. apparently dunny time is good for those with a less than regular constitution you never know it could ease your paranoia.

          • Jack The Insider says:

            Cut this shit out, dismayed. If you can’t hold a rational discussion or argument without resorting to abuse, leave.

        • Dismayed says:

          Just have a look at Yvonne’s comments there is always a shady reason or conspiracy lurking behind every shadow usually from what she considers the “lefties”. you might not be far from joining her in oaky oaks you seem to have the sky falling in most of the time also. RE my other comment to you I hear apple cider vinegar can do wonders.

    • Dwight says:

      Please. Responsibility is soooo last century.

      • Boadicea says:

        Sadly, it so often seems so these days Dwight. What’s probably of most concern to the parents is the social humiliation.

    • Dwight says:

      Read the article. The kid has it right. With a drug conviction for trafficking, he won’t be able to _visit_ the US, let alone go to school in Boston.

      • Boadicea says:

        Yep – and the mother seems to think it’s all the school’s fault! I’d suggest the boy, if he’s as mega intelligent as mum says he is, should have thought of the repercussions before importing the stuff and distributing it. A hard lesson learnt the hard way. At least he’s still alive.

      • JackSprat says:

        Tuff.

        He knew the penalities when he tried to make a fast buck.

  • Henry Blofeld says:

    Mr Insider, are you still communicating with Assange or did he just have a hissy fit and go?

  • Wissendorf says:

    Not sure why, but I thought Assange was dead. Has anyone seen him recently? I’m not sure how far his embassy can cover his movements, but if he fell ill and went to hospital, could he be arrested and deported? It must be costing a bomb to have a copper parked outside the embassy day and night. Hiding in the women’s dunny. No courage and no pride. Eventually what he stole will be out of date and worthless. What then?

  • Huger Unson says:

    I must say, Jack, I was tickled to find out just this week about the role of the “fluffer” in the dramatic arts. This tidbit has nothing to do with Assange, of course, but …

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