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Australian values — a user’s guide

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I’ve said it many times before. Australia is the best damned country in the world with the exception of some island nations in the Caribbean with some very liberal banking laws.

For all that Australia can be a confusing place, especially for Australians. There are three tiers of government, all pretty much worthless and in various stages of decrepitude shuffling between inertia, chaos all the way along to abject failure. We have a corporate world blagging its way around a laughably cobbled together regulatory system while trying not to snigger too much. There’s a mutant media that routinely crucifies people, more often that not for no apparent good reason and a taxation system that, frankly, I gave up on a long time ago.

Last week the Turnbull government announced a range of changes to the 457 visa scheme and rounded it off with tightening requirements for citizenship. At a presser and then again in an interview with Leigh Sales on the ABC, our Prime Minister, resplendent in an electric blue suit, equivocated in response to what were some fairly mild inquiries on his thoughts on Australian-ness and what he considered might be Australian values.

Full column here.

553 Comments

  • Dismayed says:

    Pass the dutchie on the left had side and have the (fucking) surgery.

  • Milton says:

    A fine, funny and sad article today, JtI. We are all going to die and we all know it – though none of us (unless you are in a US penitentiary and tucking into your final kfc drumsticks dunked into their special mash potatoes and gravy – and even then?) know exactly when and how. It seems as if it is only when our mortality is pointed out and underlined that our worst fears and panic surface as a continuous, numbing, nauseating, overwhelming and debilitating presence. Your honesty in acknowledging these “demons” is admirable and I hope it goes some way to helping you win that battle. My thoughts are with you and your family, Jack. And for a minute or three last night I had a sinking feeling that you would be the only one getting a point – I need you propping me up in the comp!
    I hope this is not too morbid:
    http://henryhargreaves.com/#no-seconds

  • John O'Hagan says:

    Just read your piece in the Weekend Oz, Jack. Powerful stuff; all I can do is offer my best wishes.

    On the present post, I agree with the general thrust, but a couple of minor quibbles:

    “E pluribus unum” means “One from many”, and was an unofficial motto that appeared on the official seal of the US government in the 18th century. The now-official “In God we trust” motto was bolted on in the 50s by Congress, IMO somewhat in conflict with the secular origins of the US. (I’m sure Dwight will correct me if this is wrong!)

    I agree with your (serious) list of Australian values: “democratic principles, participatory democracy, universal suffrage, compulsory voting, the doctrine of the separation of powers, religious freedom, freedoms of movement, speech and association”. But IMO only democratic principles and religious freedom are actually foundational in the sense of being written into the Constitution. The separation of powers and some very limited freedom of political speech were only later inferred by the much-maligned process of judicial interpretation. You could say the other values were more or less deliberately left out, and in so far as they do exist, it is only because of various political campaigns over the years.

    • jack says:

      the constitution was not the foundation of rights in Aus, just the document that bound the states together in a federation,

      • John O'Hagan says:

        I’m guessing that your point is that these are values we inherited from English common law, and that’s true enough for some of them. But regardless of the intentions of the authors of the Constitution, it is definitely a source of rights in Australia. For example, ss 24 (‘directly chosen by the people’) and 116 (on religion) have made voting, political speech and religious freedom much stronger rights than they were at common law, where all it took was a clearly-worded act of parliament to extinguish them. The same can be said of the separation of powers, which is much stronger here than in the UK because it has constitutional support.

        As counter-examples, freedom of movement and association remain common-law rights only, and as result are very vulnerable to legislative infringement. In fact, one of the few protections they have in Australia is the dreaded international law.

        Universal suffrage was never a common-law right and was won through a long struggle by the dreaded progressives of a century ago, bitterly opposed by the conservatives of the time.

        Personally I’m not sure that compulsory voting is even a value; it’s certainly not a right.

        As for participatory democracy, IMO far from being an Australian value, it’s not even a remote possibility at this stage, although it’s an admirable aspiration.

  • Eccles says:

    Jack, I had an email last night from TBLS noting that my recent months of absence had not gone un-noticed. I have been lurking, and occasionally commenting over the wall, but I will try and come out of hiding more often. I guess that my current second position overall on the tipping ladder means I’m not totally invisible, though … I am disappointed, however, that footy tipping with religious fervor did not make your list of Australian values.

    • Jack The Insider says:

      Onya, Eccles. Maybe footy tipping should be No. 11.

      • .Lou oTOD says:

        If it makes the top Ten Commandments Jack, you’re rooted. Picking the Bulldogs was one thing, but not backing Carlton is your mortal sin. I haven’t checked what the live odds were, but you would have made a tidy earn on that bet.

  • Henry Blofeld says:

    Slightly off topic, Mr Insider, but good news always welcome I say and we see Big Kimmie of North Korea has let another one rip, and of course I refer to his latest failed Missile test. It did get off the launch pad but apparently didn’t go far. If he keeps this record of failed launches up he may wipe out his own country single handedly! In the Aussie vernacular may I say “Bonzer Kimmie” keep em coming sunshine”. Glad Kimmie wasn’t around when we used to have our Cracker nights in Australia.
    http://tinyurl.com/k4c8h4u

  • Boadicea says:

    Read your article in the Weekend Magazine, Jack.
    So sorry to hear the results of the TB treatment have not killed the thing off.
    Hang in there, friend. I’m sure all here are right behind you in sending positive vibes. Xx

    • Jack The Insider says:

      No.9 Boadicea. she’ll be right. Cheers.

      • Tracy says:

        What to say Jack, it’s a long road much travelled but you get to choose the route whatever others may say.

        • Jack The Insider says:

          Thanks, Tracy and thanks to all here for their kind comments. Apologies for slow posts. Busy day as you might imagine. The Blues had a win which pleased me more than perhaps it should. I’ll get to you all in time with personal messages.

      • JackSprat says:

        Finally found the article.
        Not good mate.
        As B said, hang in there, make every minute count and may you get to see your Grand Children.

      • .Lou oTOD says:

        Jack, I also read your article in the WAM today, not good to hear the treatment thus far hasn’t had the desired result. Best wishes for the next stage of your journey.

        You are right though, what a time to be alive. I have a mate I’ve referred to here before, suffering Melanoma for six years now, and he has been chopped and changed like you wouldn’t believe. His positive attitude makes me embarrassed for what seems to be trivia that gets up my nose. He is now on the revolutionary drug that Ron Walker convinced Tony Abbott to add to the NHS. It is I believe a life saver.

        Maybe the mind doesn’t fix the problem, but sure as shit it helps on the journey.

        Best wishes mate.

  • G Wizz says:

    1. Thou shalt not skip thy Shout lest your name become mud.

    • Dwight says:

      You should see the discussions we have within my Friday-night group. You’d think we were at Panmunjom negotiating a cease fire.

  • Henry Blofeld says:

    Almost as if written for your Blog Theme, Mr Insider, Gary Linnell of the SMH paints a picture of what can at times be the “ugly Australian”, types we have all met at parties and gatherings with their “Listen Mate” and the “F word” etc. Goodness me lets hope we arnt all like that but occasionally I do myself let the “F word” slip but not often.
    http://tinyurl.com/lqkf8cp

    • Dwight says:

      There’s another four-letter word in more use here than I’m used to. An acquaintance of mine referred to me as “that Yankee c***” for the first two years he knew me. My cleaning lady–who is tiny and blonde and mid-twenties and cute; butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth–makes liberal use of it. I’m an old fuddy duddy.

      • Uncle Quentin says:

        Use your signal alphabet; the navy uses Mike Tango (MT) to refer to empty. I now refer to Charlie, Uniform, November, Tango(s).

      • .Lou oTOD says:

        How did you get a cleaning lady like that Dwight? Maybe she’s not happy about the lack of attention you’re affording her? Or maybe you just leave too much crap in the sink.

        As for the “c” word, it is amazing how fast it has entered general conversation, by both sexes. Admittedly it wasn’t invented yesterday, so must have been well travelled in medieval conversation over roast boar and dead bodies.

        • Dwight says:

          Met her when she was a bartender–no surprise. She and her sister started the business. Trying to get them to write a plan. *lol* Hazards of knowing someone who teaches this.

  • The Bow-Legged Swantoon says:

    Jack, I don’t know if your Weekend Australia piece will appear here at the blog over the weekend, but if it doesn’t I’ll say here I thought it was a very good bit of writing.

    These days accounts of life’s difficulties tend to be presented under headlines like, “I Won’t be Beaten, says 20-year-old Cancer Mum” or “He Survived AIDS, Leprosy and Chlamydia to be Australia’s Hottest Bachelor!”

    Thanks for keeping it real. Here’s a song from another dude who kept it real, and it was a fine bit of guitar playing, too:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LbhYqV17CoQ

  • Trivalve says:

    Just back from the Giant Dogs at Manuka. Giants got out of gaol really, but the Dogs were kicking like a certain other team I know. The ball was like a piece of soap, which is a common problem with night footy, especially if it’s cold. Which it was. A good reason never to have a night grand final. Nice to see Nick Maxwell close up too, running around in a fetching pink outfit. Old captains never die…

    • Jack The Insider says:

      Doggies were a bit stiff, TV. I was the only one who tipped them I noticed. Damn, damn, damn.

      • G Wizz says:

        I forgot to tip and ended up ahead of you. I don’t know how that works. I would have tipped GWS, but the rest of the weekend I’ve gone for a few outsiders. I think the Blues will spring a surprise on Sydney and the Saints will limit the Hawks to their sole win.

        • Jack The Insider says:

          Well, GW. We need to talk form more often. I had a shocker. Lions to beat Port. What was I thinking?

          • G Wizz says:

            I picked the Leos too, and thought them a good chance to knock off Port. Brisbane’s weakness is their first quarter. Their 1st qtr defense is a disorganised mess and buckles under quick pressure. Once the ship steadies, they play some good football, but they are always chasing. Turning in 14.6 against the Dogs, who booted 20 behinds, was a good effort. I went for the Suns too, but although they lost they were in the hunt. I listened to the game and it seemed there were 12 Abbletts on the field his name was called so often. I didn’t consider North a serious chance at all. Carlton were going to start kicking straight eventually. Wright’s 4 outstanding and sank any chance for the Swans. Carlton’s defense improved as the game wore on. I had a few dollars on them and got a handsome return. ;))

            I’ve taken the Crows today, but only because it’s their home ground. Can’t split them from the Tiges on form. Cats to feast on ‘pies and the Demons to roll the Bombers. The D’s shook off the easybeat tag last year and finished the season with some decent form, and they seem to back there now. Match fitness is becoming a telling factor for all teams.

          • G Wizz says:

            That was Carlton’s worst outing this year. They are a better team than current form is showing. As the young list matures and they get some match fitness, they’ll head north. If they don’t reach the eight, they be knocking on the door. Cripps was a great find. I think he headed the tackle count for the Swans game and booted a goal too.

          • Eccles says:

            Lions to beat Port? Jeepers, Jack, even I wasn’t going to fall for that one …

    • jack says:

      cracking game in the conditions

    • G Wizz says:

      Your absolutely right there Trivalve. The balls are always slippery when playing night games.

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