Humble servant of the Nation

Kim Beazley takes the drinks trolley ahead of principle

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The arrival of the Prince Charles on Australian soil, the opening of the Commonwealth Games and the appointment of Kim Beazley as Governor of Western Australian combined to rustle up the republican debate this week. There is going to be more of it next year and beyond.

The way things are going the republican movement is set to be ripped apart again due to a lack of leadership and a deep sense of paralysis when it comes to what it should be advocating and why.

Beazley’s a nice bloke without any major flaws unless you describe an addiction to KFC as a psychological disorder. He was deputy prime minister, held a raft of heavyweight portfolios and as leader of the party, led Labor to two electoral drubbings. He was well on the way to a third when Kevin Rudd stepped in.

Since then Bomber has cashed in his chips, taken the rolled gold parliamentary super and got the gig as Australia’s Ambassador to the US, offered to him by a Labor government in the same manner as one of the rarer Hallmark gift cards, the ones of the “Sorry we knifed you” variety.

Full column here.

139 Comments

  • Wissendorf. says:

    Blues played a reasonable game last night Jack. Pies won it in the second quarter. Again the stats were good, but they didn’t have the answers to Pies momentum. Pleasing to see the margin didn’t blow out in the second half, and the Blues were still trying right to the siren.

    I might not get back on here before you close up shop and go to the doctor, so I’ll take the opportunity to wish you the very best now, and I look forward to your return with solid prospects for a long and prosperous future. Go well mate. 😉

  • The Bow-Legged Swantoon says:

    This whole business of our northern neighbours’ view of our supposedly extended adolescent phase is a bit of an irrelevance. I exchanged emails a couple of years back with one of the founding members of the ARM; a journalist who was a bit angry about the quality of reportage around the visit of Will and Kate and the young George. It was a perfectly civil exchange in which I expressed my lack of support for the whole republican push and of a compelling reason to do it.

    His reply was to relate the story of an Australian politician – a Liberal and known republican – who had gone to Malaysia as part of a trade mission. During one of the breaks in the formal meetings he had got into a discussion with some Malaysian delegates who asked him how the Australians were taking instructions during the negotiations. When he asked what they meant, they said something like, “How does London tell you what they want you to do?” Our bloke patiently explained to them that London wasn’t involved and some other practical matters about Australian governance. This was evidence, wrote the correspondent, of why Australia needs to sever the ties from Britain.

    Now, call me cynical, but I then asked him whether it was possible that the Malaysians might have been taking the piss just a bit; whether they knew that our mate was a republican and were engaging in a little diplomatic leg-pulling to unsettle him? He never got back to me on that but the idea that the Malaysians were unaware of how our trade arrangements work and that we have London manage these things is a tad far-fetched. I suspect they’re a bit more sophisticated than that and were just taking a rare opportunity to needle someone they knew would take it personally.

    • Jack The Insider says:

      As is this.

      • The Bow-Legged Swantoon says:

        Nothing at all personal in it, mate. I just think the idea that other nations are somehow confused about, or otherwise care what our constitutional arrangements are, is not a strong argument for the proposed change.

        I mean, I know that my neighbours occasionally look askance at how I live. What difference does it make if I’m happy, if not always ecstatic, about my circumstances? It’s none of their business.

        • BASSMAN says:

          You say… I just think the idea that other nations are somehow confused

          ….especially when our flag and national anthem gets mixed up with New Zealand’s

    • Trivalve says:

      I’d check with Penny on that one BLS. You may be right but it wouldn’t surprise me in the least that they thought that. Too simplistic by far they would reckon.

    • Penny says:

      Well said TBLS and yes the Malaysians are well aware of how our trade agreements work. In fact I’m always a bit spooked as to how much Malaysians are aware of how everything works in Australia, including investing their money into accounts that seem to be a result of money laundering. They of course have their own King, changes every few years though as it’s shared among the various Sultans.
      I consider myself a Republican and I also favour electing the President, provided it can be as bi-partisan as possible. I’m disappointed in Kim Beasley I must say and I think that his actions make the whole republican movement look ridiculous. Don’t really have a problem with Peter Fitzsimons although his bandanna is an affectation I could do without. I bought his book on Burke and Wills but finding it a bit hard to get into. It is veeery long.
      Good luck next week JTI, we will miss the blog.

      • The Bow-Legged Swantoon says:

        They’re certainly not dummies, the Malaysians. As a nation we still suffer from that racial conceit that led Churchill to believe that sneaking a submarine through the Sea of Marmara and hoisting the Union Jack off Constantinople would make the wogs throw up their hands in terror and surrender.

        We really have to get over the belief that foreigners are less smart and brave than we are. It’s just silly.

      • The Bow-Legged Swantoon says:

        They’re certainly not dummies, the Malaysians. As a country we still suffer from that racial conceit that led Churchill to believe that sneaking a submarine through the Sea of Marmara and hoisting the Union Jack off Constantinople would make the wogs throw up their hands in terror and surrender.

        We really have to get over the belief that foreigners are less smart and brave than we are. It’s just silly.

  • Henry Blofeld says:

    Those hard nosed Republicans who bend over and take the Queens Coin, Mr Insider, have no shame. Take Bill Hayden when he was GG he had the hide to complain that the thumping noise of the Kangaroos at Yarralumla was disturbing his early morning sleep! He wanted a cull that brought howls of protest so not sure what happened, most likely some Slippers for the Roos!

  • Razor says:

    Great article mate. Loved the ‘heavy weight portfolios’. I’m out when Lizzy goes as I cannot stand the thought of that buffoon who is currently infesting our country in the top job.

  • BASSMAN says:

    The bomber is a disaster…multiply nearly $500k per governor, their gardens,staff cars, chauffers, wine cellars in every
    state as well as their huge pensions for life and you will see the monarchy costs us millions. Every time the Royals come here we pay and this time I saw them on an air force jet at $7,000 an hour. Their visit with cars, security, transport will cost a few million. That is a LOT of hip and knee replacements. That is a LOT of hip and knee replacements. Don’t get me wrong I like the Queen…especially the way she has tried to control her brats and keep the family together. Charlie is a disgrace. Diana would be still alive only for him and Mrs Carpet Bowls. Many Poms have never forgiven him for that and his tampon monologue.

    The vote on the Republic failed last time because it was NOT a vote on the Republic! We were not asked if we wanted a Republic. That was too simple to get the right answer. Instead, Howard first rigged the constitutional convention. Half (yes HALF!) of the delegates were appointed by him (the government) only the other half were elected democratically-why not the lot?…what a rort. How dumb was Turnbull…as soon as he saw this set-up he should have said FORGET it and called the whole thing off and not wasted our money. Then there was the question. Howard couldn’t just open up with:- Would U like to have an Australian Head of State or Would you like to see an Australian Republic? Oh no that would be too straight and cut and too easy to give an answer. Howard came up with such a complicated dog’s breakfast of a question to vote on (a model), that it scared the be-Jesus out of everybody. The people did NOT say NO to the Republic because Howard did not ask us if we wanted a Republic. He asked us if we wanted a Head of State elected by a two thirds majority of Parliament. A very cunning way of avoiding and confusing the main question…DO YOU WANT AN AUSTRALIAN REPUBLIC…yes or no? He skilfully divided the Republicans. I expect we will be chained to the rails of Buckingham Palace forever.

  • JackSprat says:

    I like Kim.
    He was an excellent Ambassador to the US and always seemed to be a decent human being.
    The republic is years off.
    I am sure he will make an excellent Governor and, if he is in the position when the republic happens, he can be in line for the first President.
    Our future lies with the whole world and Asia will be a big part of it.
    In my view we will never be part of Asia – just a strange bunch to the South of them who treats them courteously and with respect but have their own, in their eyes, strange customs – kind of like the Switzerland of this sphere of the globe .
    Having a plebiscite on the Republic gives Shorten a brownie point from me – won’t get my vote though.
    I love it when journos take a swipe at another one – wordsmiths do it so much better than the rest of us.

  • Lou oTOD says:

    Jack, there is only a short distance between the pig and the trough. It is beyond the lofty principles of democratic structures to knock back a gig with all the trappings and unlimited KFC.

    By the way, ditto for Asian countries, some of whom have had the dubious benefit of colonial rule. I dont think they give a fat fig about where our head of state reports to so long as they know where their next jerrymandered election will,leave them.

    As for Paul Keating, he will probably go to his grave a frustrated and cranky old fart. Nice.

    • JackSprat says:

      Keating seems to be getting crankier.
      I wonder how many phone calls he gets from Bill a day – that would be enough to send anybody over the edge and want to get back into it again.
      Nobody on either side seems to have a clear cut message anymore.
      They all need to go on a Sales 101 course and learn how to sell.

    • Milton says:

      As Hawke said, Keating is a hater. There is no compelling argument for a republic it is simply that the likes of Keating and Fitzsimons can’t stand the Royals and have some chip on their shoulder about them. And all this worrying about what the rest of the world thinks of us is just more cultural cringe. The fact is the rest of the world doesn’t think about us.

      • Trivalve says:

        You hate as well as Keating Milton

      • Milton says:

        As always good points Milt, but also add in the costs of changing to a republic. They would make the cost of a ssm plebiscite look like small beer; and for what benefit? Like it or not, the head of the republic would be a political one, and most would agree our political landscape is a desert of gravitas. At the very least the monarchy are non partisan re our politics. At their very best they inform fashions, humour, children’s names, sell papers and provide us (all of us) a link to a history, and one that has manifestly informed present day Australia. God save the Queen.

  • Henry Blofeld says:

    I like Kim Beazley, Mr Insider, in some ways he reminds me of Bill Hayden who missed the main prize but collected some attractive consolation “take home” ones. As WA Governor am sure he will serve his State well and he did us all as US Ambassador. Possibly he was “too nice” to grab the main chance and as we all know being nice in Politics means finishing 2nd, you have to have a touch of the “mongrel”, the killer instinct as it were. Nice column as always.

    • Razor says:

      Yep spot on HB. I find Kim a hard man to dislike. He will do a fantastic job for them and will love all the military fanfare.

      • Tracy says:

        One of the few decent blokes but totally over the jobs for the boys, they are on a bloody good whack from the taxpayer with their pensions as it is.
        Time they had to wait for their super like the rest of us.

      • Carl on the Coast says:

        He’s also an easy man to like Razor.😋

  • Uncle Quentin says:

    Yeah, the Beezer. Challenged later about the scrapping of the Melbourne just after a multi million dollar refit and the selling the Skyhawks to New Zealand. “It was a good idea at the time”. Truth was that labor always hated the fleet air arm and took the first opportunity to get rid of it. Likewise saw him twisting and turning like a twisty turney thing trying to justify the three mines policy, and then after that was scrapped, no nuclear power.
    When pointed out (as been since proven often) we’d have been better off putting educational resources towards TAFE and trade training, kept blathering on about the importance of a university degree.
    Always a creature of the factions, he could have won the 1998 election if he had run the Keating strategy of saying the election was a referendum on the GST and labor would pass it, but the unions wouldn’t let him.
    That ended any chance he would be PM.

    Personally I don’t give a rats arse about the republic.

    • Trivalve says:

      After which your Kiwi mates decided that they didn’t need an air force at all and flogged them off too. But what’s this ‘Labor always hated the fleet air arm’? Where does that come from?

  • Lou oTOD says:

    OT with speed JTI, but I missed the cutoff from the last blog.

    The only event from the Commonwealth Games I promised to watch was the Opening Ceremony. Twas a couple of good songs wrapped in a parade of kitch.

    The best was the simulted change of clothes on the fake beach with the towell screen. What could go wrong? Yep, the towells dropped for a full arse plus a bit view of one participant zoomed in by the camera. The bum in question has happily idenitifed herself, Georgia Lear. Talk about named for the event!

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